There are lots of research telling us why getting married is the right thing to do, why it is better than not being married. Most, if not all the research is biased from a marriage perspective at least. Saying that, it is easy to see that the reality supports that being married, at least from a male perspective, is not a good decision. Brad Wilcox’s highly flawed perspective on marriage is a perfect example of this.
I Feel like Having a Poop
Just the title alone leads one to think, maybe this is a bit biased. The title of his presentation of the facts is ‘Be a Man. Get Married’. What the fuck does that mean? I am not married. Am I not a man? This is absolutely typical of the female, mangina, simp, white knight, gynocentric perspective. This is a classical ad hominem attack on men. This is male-shaming. Yes, I am going to get married because you shamed me into getting married because, after all, I am a man and extremely insecure with my ‘maleness’, that just the act of shaming me is going to sway me to get married and become a disposable man seen as nothing more than someone else’s resource. From my male perspective, this alone is enough to make me puke.
Marriage Certificate: The Most Valuable Thing you Will Never Own
So, let’s see what the facts say, shall we? Wilcox’s first argument is that a marriage certificate might be the most valuable thing you will ever own. He goes on to share a fictional anecdote of a young, 19-year-old, man named Doug Taulbee, who works for minimum wage at a factory complete with a t-shirt displaying the anarchist ‘A’. Doug lives in his parent’s basement, doesn’t have a care in the world and has no bills. Now, this just gets super weird here. The next statement is “but after marrying at 19 and having kids, Taulbee’s perspective changed”.
Argumentation Feminist Style
What world or era is this Taulbee character living in and why do people making their biased arguments seem so delusional? Why do they find a need to try and trick, fool or persuade people based on ridiculous, unrealistic statements? These statements do not ground their arguments, they make them baseless.
I am a Stupid Man
Again, I am just a man and I am stupid. I don’t need realistic, sound premises. Why the heck would this guy get married in the first place? For tang? He has stated that he doesn’t have a care in the world, has no bills and, consequently, does not need a great paying job to be happy. Additionally, an overwhelming majority of people do not get married at 19 years old nor do they have children at that age in the world I live. Any person can do a less than 5 second search in Google and see that this is not a sound premise. For those of us too lazy to do that, I have done that for us. Here is a link to some statistics on marriage ages per country (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EtvfHnZMcOY) quickly found in under 5 seconds. Nevertheless, let’s continue, shall we?
Don’t be so Selfish
So, Taulbee’s perspective changed, and being a stupid male conditioned by mass media, feminists, women, simps, manginas, white knights and geocentricism he posits, “I had to step up and think about others and start taking care of them.” Forget about me, that’s selfish. I can picture the cogs just a spinning now in all these delusional people’s spacious, vacuous heads right now. “That’s so selfish and self-centered, you should be thinking about me, not you!” It’s such an ironical position, that the only reasonable excuse for such a thought process that comes to mind is the Dunning-Kruger effect.
Be Independent and Make Someone Else Pay for You
Continuing, “Taulbee quit his factory job and joined the army. He did this because it gave him significantly more money and received housing and health care paid for by the military.” So, Taulbee quit his job to step up and take care of his new family by relinquishing what little independence he had so that taxpayers can now pay for his home and medical expenses for his family. That is how gynocentric people think. I am going to be independent and let you pay for my stuff. Then I am going to pat myself on the back and think how noble I am.
Do not Die Unless You Have Good Health Insurance, then it is OK
There seems to be no deliberation here for the facts that Taulbee is probably not going to be around his family for long periods of time if deployed overseas or that he might be injured or killed. Further, it is insinuated that unmarried men never do this, that you need to be married to pursue this path in life.
Women and Married Men use the same Logic, go Figure
Moving forward, Wilcox states that whenever Taulbee saw a chance at promotion he pursued it which gave him more money and benefits for himself and his family. I have to admit, I am having a difficult time following the marriage logic or any logic here at all. Is Wilcox purporting that single men do not like money or promotion? Is Wilcox married? If he is, can I ascribe to the notion that married men cannot think logically? I think that would be intellectual dishonest of me, but I digress.
Wasting your Life is OK
Continuing, in a further bid to boost his family’s income Taulbee left the army for a job at a car dealership and is now pulling in 6 figures. Could one conceive that he just wasted huge amounts of time in his life by even joining the army in the first place. He could have just have gotten a job in the car dealership in the first place at a low-level job, work his up the ladder, have substantial seniority, and have been enjoying a substantially larger income for years before now.
Women Never Benefit from Marriage
At this point, we see Wilcox solemnly stating on screen that “men who see no need to marry, or are reluctant to marry until they make more money, could benefit from Taulbee’s discovery”. The first key point is that marriage has a transformative effect on the behavior, emotional health and financial well-being of adults, especially men. I guess there is absolutely no benefit for women here at all. I fail to understand which position this point is arguing for. Thankfully Wilcox goes on to position this statement and give it context, kind of.
The Strategic Decision Maker
“Men who get married, work harder and more strategically, and earn more money than their single peers from similar backgrounds.” Well, thank goodness Wilcox cleared that up. So, to sum up this premise for an argument for marriage, one can take from the statement that men need to work harder if they are married. Um…, that’s a good thing or a bad thing? I don’t know. Arguing further, men work more strategically. Unfortunately, Wilcox’s fictitious anecdote shows the complete opposite or Taulbee would have just went to the car dealer in the first place.
If you have more Expenses, you need more Income
Married men earn more money than single peers from similar backgrounds. Yes, finally, even though research supports this premise, it is like saying even though Trump won the electoral vote, he lost the popular vote. I take away that men that are married, have more responsibility and expenses and therefore need to earn more money. I think that is logical.
Wilcox states, “Marriage transforms men’s social world. They spend less time with friends and more with family. They go to bars less and to church more.” I literally found myself scratching my head here. Is this an argument for marriage or against marriage? After all, a sound, effectively persuasive argument is a two-sided argument where you state both the pros and cons. I am taking away from this premise that this is a con for marriage and not a pro.
A = B, B = C, therefore A = C
Wilcox then goes on to state a tautology from Nobel Prize-winning economist George Akerlof that does nothing but reduce my respect for the judges that award Nobel Prizes by quoting Akerlof using some weird form of English grammar quotation usage that makes my ability to quote him extremely difficult due to my own lack of English grammar knowledge but I will try. “Men “settle down when they get married; if they fail to get married, they fail to settle down.”” I do not understand the relevance but I will offer you, the reader, my own tautology with hopes I can clear up any confusion. Men commit suicide when they get depressed; if they fail to get depressed, they fail to commit suicide. I am sure that settles the argument and makes the point crystal clear.
Get Away from Her More by Working More
Continuing, Wilcox states that his own research correlates with Akerlof’s view. Married men work about 20% more each year than single men. For every single man that works a normal 2,000-hour year, married men work 2,400 hours. I am not sure how this correlates with Akerlof’s view. What I personally feel about this statistic is that married men must work more per year. Married men work over 2 months more per 12-month year, full time, than single men. Personally, that is not a motivating point for me to rush out and get married. I am left with a feeling that not only do married men have more expenses but they also stay at work longer because they cannot stand going home to their wife and family.
Not Being able to quit a bad Job is Good
Quoting an unsourced Harvard study, Wilcox says it found that married men were much less likely than their single peers to quit their current job unless they had another one lined up. I personally take away from this statement at face value that married men need to tolerate a potentially stressful job, jerk boss or even a dangerous working environment because of their increased expenses and responsibilities.
Working More for Less is Good
Wilcox carries on, championing that married men earn 20% more annual income than their single peers. This does not make any sense whatsoever other than the fact that married men are willing to work a whopping 20% or 400 hours more a year, which is overtime, at a normal wage. Wilcox espouses that this holds true even after controlling for differences of various factors. Never is it mentioned that married men have more expenses and obligations let alone the fact that the divorce rate in the US, which is not the highest, but 10th highest in the world, is over 50%. Perhaps the “single” men in this research are all divorced.
Being Single is Bad
To this, Wilcox questions, “Why is there such a substantial marriage premium? There are at least four important reasons”. Firstly, he goes on to say men assume a new identity, that they become a man only if they marry. Implied is that single men are not responsible, have no meaning in life and that the world discriminates against single men giving married men status therefore get married.
Divorced Men are Not Happy
Secondly, married men work more after marrying and make better work choices. As stated in the earlier anecdote they don’t make better work choices and they are stuck with these choices longer feeling obligated weighed down with expenses and responsibilities. After divorce men work less. This connects that divorced men become happier after a divorce and for the most part need less money to live.
There are no such thing as Men’s rights
Wilcox mentions that Sociologist Elizabeth Gorman states that married men are more likely to value higher paying jobs than their single peers. To me, this means that you, as a man, are nothing but a resource for others. Why is a higher paying job that keeps you away from your family and away from things you enjoy, that make you as a man happier, more valued? More valued to who? It appears that the needs, desires and health of a man physically and psychologically are not important to anyone, unless it gets in the way of them getting more from you regarding resources. This correlates directly with the fact that women today do not acknowledge men’s rights and either laugh or scoff at the very mention of men’s rights.
Discriminating Against Single Men is a good Thing
Thirdly, data shows that employers prefer and promote men who are married. Talk about the snake eating its own tail. This very statement drives feminist to drop a load right on the floor before you. Hush, hush now tootsie, married men are more responsible and dedicated workers than single men and women. You don’t take your job seriously, you are going to get pregnant and need time off and you don’t work as much as married men. We are going to promote married men over you. Sorry.
Nagging Wives are a man’s Greatest Joy
Finally, married men benefit from the advice and encouragement of their wives. Further, with an obvious interest in their success, there is no better motivator for a man than his wife. This leads to the questions, why is the wife motivated for her husband’s success and how will she motivate him? Honey, I know you have been hard at work for the past 12 years and I am concerned for your happiness, why don’t you take a two-week vacation with your friends up to Northern Canada, go on an awesome northern pike fishing trip and unwind even if it will cost $2,000? Why doesn’t he? Because his wife will rarely if ever state that question, that’s why. If you think you are going fishing on Saturday with your friends, not only will you be sleeping on the couch, but you won’t catch a whiff of gash for months.
Everyone Gets Married and has Children at 19
Wilcox concludes with, “the tragedy is that despite all the good news we keep learning about the benefits of marriage, the institution is in retreat.” He goes on to quote statistics that prove his own fictitious anecdote of Doug Taulbee, who married at 19 years of age, existed in the early 1900s and that men are retreating from marriage at historic rates. He states how obvious, without data mind you, that marriage has always been a clear path to a better life and if you don’t believe him, he challenges you to just go ask Doug Taulbee, who is fictitious, or any of the millions like him.
Get Inspired, Get Married
The problem I have with this video is that this video is supposed to inspire men to rush out and get married. Are these the best arguments for being married Wilcox can come up with? It’s totally one sided and neglects the huge amount of data that is piling up against marriage daily. Even reality, that marriage is not working and in decline, cannot sway Mr. Wilcox from his desired ineffective, persuasive argument. I feel it does the exact opposite.
You don’t Like what you Like
Here is my takeaway from the video’s arguments. Do you enjoy spending time with your friends, going to the bar and doing whatever makes you happy whenever you want? Then don’t get married. Do you enjoy working so much that you don’t have time for anything else in your life until you die while not even getting remunerated fairly for your efforts? Then don’t get married. Do you enjoy earning 20% more income even though you have 2,000% more expenses than a single man while enjoying being a resource for someone other than yourself? Then don’t get married. Do you enjoy having your needs, desires and happiness ignored? Then don’t get married. Do you enjoy being nagged to the point that you either want to put a bullet in your head or in your wife’s head or both? Then don’t get married.
Alimony is Fun
This video does not even address serious issues of property rights, divorce, child custody, child payments and fidelity which only reduce the reasons a man might consider marriage to be not only a bad financial decision, but a bad decision in general. Many of the arguments do not even consider long term, serious relationships outside marriage which is a somewhat viable option. Until society begins to address the real issues as to why marriage is in decline and the position of men, marriage will inevitably continue to go the way of the dinosaur. There is no wonder why MGTOW philosophies are thriving today and will continue to thrive for the foreseeable future.
I would be interested in hearing your position on marriage.